I preached this morning. You know me, I typically like to have everything written down, fairly well organized, and all of my ducks in a row before I go in to do the service. I think that it is very important to be as prepared as is humanly possible as any number of variables can occur once you get there. I almost never, ever go in without my sermon written! Why? First, I love to write, and secondly, I am one heck of a variable as is my brain. However, today's text was about being prepared for the coming of Jesus, and because I am pretty sure that nobody in Jesus' time was really prepared for all of the chaos that surrounded the wee one's birth, I opted to go in cold.
Rah, there is something that is a little liberating when one is free to let the spirit ebb and flow where it will. I told the story about Jesus' birth and we all agreed if that was to happen today, nobody would be prepared for that scenario to unfold. Additionally, nobody would even believe it if a young woman said that she had conceived a child that was the son of God, that she was INDEED a virgin, and that he would be the way, the life, and the truth for humankind! Even as a pastor, that would be a total stretch. So, while we say that we are ready if Jesus came today, I really have to wonder if we actually are. Then I talked about the cruelty of Christ's death on the cross. When we look around and we think there is so much horror in our own world, imagine that whole scene as it went down. My sermon actually went better than I expected, and I even got a little weepy. Then, guess what, this sweet little congregation that swept me up into their lives and gave me a church home, CLAPPED! I was so touched that I can hardly put it into words . . . sigh . . . I could have never prepared for that.
As is often the case in life, there are bipolar moments in any given day. I called you to see how your morning at work was, and for some reason, the two of us were kind of out of sync. I think I might have been a little off because of some life stuff, but for some reason, the pair of us entered the dark place. I hate the dark place, and even more than that, I hate that it is so utterly easy to go there. Additionally, I am pretty sure that I indeed went there first and opted to stay there. You were trying to share about a Racing Extinction documentary that you thought I should watch. I told you that I had heard about it, on Bobby Bones, of course. I will watch it, but sometimes there are images that I just am not prepared to watch. OR maybe I am not prepared to see more in this world that is ugly above and beyond what I see on a daily basis. OR maybe, I am not sure what commitments I would make to trying to change things above and beyond what I already attempt to do. I don't really know, but by the end of the conversation, there were two pretty unhappy girls. I started to cry and then I disconnect. I told you that I had to go. When I get like that, some space is the best thing for ME; however, my space is not the best thing for those around me.
I frustrated you. My phone was nearly dead so I opted to plug it in . . . in the other room. I plopped into the recliner in true pity party fashion, cried a bit, then closed my eyes and fell asleep, FOR AN HOUR! When I woke up, I went in to get my phone and realized that you had called 3 times in an attempt to figure out where we got out of sync. We talked about the dark place, and I think we need to remember that we need to let others be the light when we go to that spot free from light. We talked things through, like we always do, came to a place of understanding, and moved on.
I hope that your WOD (Workout of the Day) in honor of Corey Rystad went AMAZING! Know that it was going to be hard, and full of challenge, but it was in honor of someone who profoundly impacted your life. I promise I will watch BOTH videos even if I cringe and cry! Then we can talk about the images I won't be able to forget. Then I will try and do something to positively impact my world, its environment, and the animal kingdom. By the way, I thought it was cool that Aaron Culling saved the turtles! I would do anything for you Rah . . . even if it hurts me a little or a lot. You may have to help me prepare to the best of your ability, and then walk with me through the rubble of my world.
I love you!
Mom
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Dear Mom,
When I began to tell you about the documentary (which I am going to write about tomorrow) my intention was only to tell you about it. I think the first thing I said that got us on separate pages was "you should watch it!" In that moment, I said that you should watch it because I was talking to you. But I told you that I was going to write about it because I think everyone should watch it. It's a powerful film, for people like me and people like you.
You're right, it is far too easy for us to get to "the dark place." I'm a lot like you when it comes to needing a bit of space every now and then when there's a disagreement. But in today's case, I knew that I needed to fix whatever I had done to put you in the dark place ASAP. So for that whole hour that you did not answer your phone, I was going nuts. All I wanted to do was iron out the issue and make you feel a little better! And just to be clear, if you don't want to watch the film you certainly don't have to watch it. It's heartbreaking because it's the truth. Same with Cowspiracy. Fortunately and unfortunately, the problems of the world (human, animal and environmental) are the things that fuel my fire and I will always encourage people to watch films and read books that could potentially be life changing.
On a lighter note, I am SO happy to hear that preaching went well this morning! How cool that the congregation loved your message and that they clapped!! That's awesome! And things like that don't happen often in church. Proud of you!
The hero WOD today in honor of Corey went well! I mean, it was incredibly tough but they always are. There were probably between 15-20 people who showed up for it. That's many more than usual on a Sunday! Coach Jeremy began the WOD by rounding everyone up to tell Corey's story. Then he opened it up to me to say a few words. I kept it short or I probably would have gotten a little emotional. The workout took me around 15 minutes. I wore shorts for it too, which was stupid because we had to do some rope climbs. My thighs are all rope burned. Totally worth it though! It's a workout that I will probably repeat every year on the anniversary of Corey's death. We all took a picture after the WOD too but Coach has that on his phone. He'll probably post it on FB tomorrow or something.
Oh also, I forgot to tell you this story about Booboo yesterday. So I had fed the cats and I put Booboo's treat in my bathroom. I decided to keep her in the bathroom while I showered because the other two cats like to beat on her when I shower. So anyway, I opened up the closet door so she had my bathroom and the closet to hang out in for the next 10 minutes or so. Well when I was just finishing up washing my hair, I heard a HUGE crash in the closet and all the sudden Booboo BOLTS in the shower with the water still running and then she frantically jumped out SOAKING wet!! I mean SOAKED! It was SO sad! Sometimes she hides in the bath tub when she gets scared but apparently she didn't realize that I had the shower going. My poor girl! Naturally I got out of the shower immediately after that to see what all the fuss was about. She must have been trying to climb on the shelf because both of the cat carriers fell down along with tons of blankets. After that I dried her with a towel as much as I could but she kept running away from me, like I was the one who threw her in the shower. She was in shock. It was a truly devastating moment but slightly comical.
Alrighty, I am going to go to sleep now. I think I'm starting to get a head cold, just in time for my final couple weeks of classes. Great! Talk to you tomorrow. Love you!
Rah
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